I am so over this pandemic. That doesn’t mean that the pandemic is over. The stats coming out every day are sad enough and scary enough for me to continue to take it seriously.
With our normal routines on hold, Batman and I have been staying home all the time unless it’s a trip to the grocery store. Our bank account has thanked us for that. With so few plans to make, my writer’s brain has so far thanked me for staying home.
My first book is still with my editor, whom I should hear from any day now. My second book is with a trusted friend who doesn’t mind reading it before it’s been super edited and polished. I started my third book.
For those keeping tabs, I have TWO (2) completed manuscripts and a third in the works! That’s exciting.
I’m excited because I’m finally beginning to see publishing at the end of this very long tunnel. I’m excited because for all the years I wasted being afraid to do it, it’s happening. I’m excited because I’m inching closer and closer to accomplishing a dream.
And now we get back to current events when linked to my writer’s brain: I’m so over this pandemic.
At first, I was like look at all this time I have to write with minimal distractions! I decided to move forward with self-publishing. I hired an editor. I completed my second book and sent it to my friend. I started a third book.
Now, I’m stalling.
While my husband is very much a social butterfly and an extrovert, I’m what’s known as an extroverted introvert. Meaning, I’m anxious and nervous all the way up to going out and being around people. Then once I’m there in the midst of it, I have a blast. I talk to everyone, I socialize and drink and dance. Back at home, I collapse and find myself surprised at the mental energy I expended while out among the masses.
When the pandemic became widely known, I thought I was in paradise. Stay at home orders? I’m on it! Social distancing? Living the dream! Isolation? Yep! I signed up years ago!
Now, in the greatest twist of them all, I’m starting to miss everyone. I miss the people from Batman’s dart league. I miss my football watching friends and some of the bartenders at the sports bars we usually frequent when the season is on. I miss both of our extended families immensely.
I miss stressing out until we get to the destination of choice and then having a great time.
Weird, right?
My extended family took part in a zoom call just recently. I was naturally anxious leading up to it and then really enjoyed the time catching up with everyone afterward. It was my normal schtick, just altered a bit because of the lack of physical contact like hugging and back slapping.
It felt good. I miss it.
And so I remind myself once again that just because I’m over the pandemic, does not mean that the pandemic is over. It’s, in fact, serious business that should be taken seriously.
It’s also good to remind ourselves that someday it will be over. Someday we’ll be able to get back to living life in the way we usually do with all of our anxieties, insecurities, jubilations and silliness – all of our humanity. I get anxious just thinking about it… but once we’re there, it’ll be just fine.